May 18, 2006

tips for life

Tips for Life

got this email...

If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost instantly removed.

Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away!

Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink.

High blood pressure sufferers: Simply cut yourself and bleed for awhile, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.

Mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough anymore.

Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

If you woke up breathing today, congratulations! You have another chance.

Be really good to your family and friends. You never knnow when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan.


Mistyjoy said...

hay naku mouse baka mapaaga ang kamatayan kopag sinunod ko makabagong mga tips mo...

parang gusto ko na rin ngang sundin yung tips sa highblood pressure e bwahaha!!! nakakahighblood kasi dito sa work ko, daming makukulit :-)

phoebe said...

speaking of bedpan... nakagamit na ako nun ng maospital ako dahil sa dengue. hehe... nakakalungkot pag naiisip ko. katakot yun. kala ko mamamatay na ko. hehe

parang ayokong gawin yung mga sinabi mo. ikakamatay ko atah yan eh. hehe. iiwasan ko nalang magkasakit.

Ann said...

palagay ko rin nga mas mapapadali buhay ko dito..hehehe.